The Kaleidoscope Practice

Always Changing; Never Changing

I have found kaleidoscopes to be a great model for how we can the challenges and opportunities of our daily lives. Sometimes, when faced with new possibilities, whether in our work, or our relationships, we get excited by how fresh and new and novel the experience can be. Similarly, when we feel pleased by how we face a significant challenge, we take comfort in our ability to draw upon resources we may have even known we possessed. We seem so capable of changing when we need to, of adjusting and adapting to whatever it is that life has in store for us.

But just as often, we may find ourselves in situations where we are clinging to what we value, what we hold dear, and where we don’t want to release and let go. At those times, we want to hold fast to what is familiar and a source of stability and security. We want to resist the changes that may be swirling around us with all our might.

So, there we are, seeking to find a balance between change and sameness, between evolving toward something new or hanging onto what we recognize and hold dear. Is there a way to strike that balance in our lives?

What We can Learn from Kaleidoscopes

I have found that kaleidoscopes offer us a model of how to change while staying the same. Think about it. A kaleidoscope is a cylindrical barrel that contains differently shaped pieces of colored glass through which a beam of light enters before reaching reaching our eye. We don’t add new pieces of glass to the barrel, nor do we take any away. The kaleidoscope remains unchanging. And yet, by rotating the barrel ever so slightly, the pieces of glass realign in an infinite variety of positions relative to each other. The result is a constantly changing pattern that dances before our eyes.

In my work with clients, I think about the metaphor of the kaleidoscope. Client come to me facing challenges and crises of all sorts. Often, they believe a monumental change in aspects of their lives will be necessary to feel better again. A new job. A new romantic partner. A new relationship to their body (e.g., losing 60 lbs.) or the total transformation of a destructive habit (e.g., succumbing to the addictive allure to porn in lieu of true intimacy with a partner).

But the kaleidoscope image offers a different path. Just rotate the barrel a little bit and a whole new perspective comes into view. Small, incremental changes made consistently over time lead to powerful shifts in our outlook and our experience.

The Practice

So, as you begin this practice, keep the image and idea of the kaleidoscope in mind. Maybe the small first step in the change you are seeking is to calm your mind and settle your body? Maybe the next step can be sitting with awareness of what has been with less self-punishing negative judgment? Perhaps the next step can be to allow yourself, without becoming to attached to any specific future outcome, to simply wonder, to hold open the possibility that positive change can arise? And like the kaleidoscope’s barrel that you hold in your hands, all that is necessary to allow a new perspective to emerge is to “rotate the barrel,” to allow just one small change at a time. Sometimes, that is all that is necessary to activate a change process that is truly transformative.